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@VSS365 is on Twitter. VSS means Very Short Story. 365 represents every day of the year.

Every day a new prompt word is tweeted.  You have to tweet a story, poem or acrostic of no more than 280 characters based upon that day’s prompt word. Stories etc must be short enough to fit in a single tweet but big enough to make you laugh or cry or scream. Other than that there do not seem to be any rules.  So, I like to combine my very short stories with an acrostic.

Include #vss365 and #(whatever the prompt word is that day) with your tweet. No prizes – just for fun but it gets your mind working.  Try it on days when you feel like it, just when you want to.  Starting on 17 October 2018 my aim is to create 365 consecutive tweets.

My 1 June 2019 vss365 entry for ‘Ancient’ was selected for publication in the 2019 VSS 365 Anthology.

My efforts so far are below:

***

23 Aug 2019

As I said, her #wild ways could #blindside me. But I would never kill her. Our love could be intensely #bright but, in a rare moment of sanity, I’d thought it

Best

Resisting

It’s

Glaring

Heat

Temporarily.

I have an alibi for that night.

22 Aug 2019

As I was saying yesterday … she was constantly unpredictable, tempestuous, #wild. Being with her meant

Wandering

In

Lost

Directions

in an emotional wilderness. It took ages for me to realise. By the time I’d learnt how to tame her it was too late.

(Show this thread)

The suspect later amended his statement to say:

Wandering

In

Lost

Directions,

Endlessly

Rambling,

Never

Experiencing

Shared

Satisfaction

in an emotional wilderness.

***

21 Aug 2019

#blindside

She’d blindsided me again. It was unexpected, like a

Bomb

Lobbed

Into (a)

New

Dimension,

Suddenly

Initiating (a)

Deadly

Explosion;

Devastating.

First panic, then questions. She was constantly unpredictable. I both loved and hated her equally.

***

20 Aug 2019

We thought we were secure. Our little boat was in a safe #haven with the

Harbour

Affording

Virtually

Every

Necessity

to ride out any storm. We were wrong. There could be no shelter against a tsunami. By morning it was wrecked a half mile inland.

***

19 Aug 2019

I didn’t like the client. I was paid to #linger outside his house to check on his wife’s activities whilst he cheated. It meant

Loitering

Into

Night-time

Guarding

Entrance

Reluctantly.

Soon she started letting me in. It just developed from there.

***

18 Aug 2019

In Shergar’s alternative universe, the horse was never put out to stud but kept on racing. The #favourite continued to be

First

And

Victorious;

One

Upsetting,

Rightfully

In

The

End,

those who sought to profit from his theft.

***

17 Aug 2019

“There is no train.” We watched the CCTV footage from the night. “I didn’t #imagine it. So it’s still to happen then. Time will repeat itself.

I

Might

Actually

Guess

It’s

Never

Expected

but it will arrive. He will be on it and you have to stop him getting off.”

***

16 Aug 2019

His note: Our attraction at the #symphony rehearsals was instant.

Since

Yesterday

My

Performance

Harmonises

Only

Near

Yours.

 

Suddenly

You

Make

Playing

Heavenly,

Orchestrating

Notes

In

Exquisite

Syncopation.

Can we meet later to make more music?

***

15 Aug 2019

London 7/7/2005: A series of bomb #explosions on public transport, designed to cause panic. There was the

E

X

Pected

Loss

Of

Senses

In (the)

O

N

Slaught

but the Londoners quickly recovered and got on with life. Terror was not allowed to succeed.

***

14 Aug 2019

He drove for ages before calming down to think it over. She’d accused him of being #stubborn but she could also be

So

Totally

Uncompromising,

Bloody-minded

But…

On

Reflection…

Necessary

in his life. So, was she right; should they start a family?

***

13 Aug 2019

To be a slave is one thing. To be forced to kill to provide entertainment is something else entirely. Better to be a #renegade, a

Rebel,

Except

Now

Each

Gladiator

Actually

Destroys

Enemies

not comrades. And each can claim “I am Spartacus.”

***

12 Aug 2019

He’d withdrawn into himself, developing a #shell against further hurt,

So

He

Expected

Little

Love

in return. She adopted patience and kindness, knowing that if she applied both then he would be worth the wait and that eventually he would love again.

***

11 Aug 2019

#vermillion

Where does Spiderman get his outfit? Is it really likely that he has the materials or the skills to turn a

Very

Elastic

Red

Material

Into

Latex

Leotard.

It’s                                                                             In

Obviously                                                                One

Not                                                                            Night

something that Peter Parker could make himself.

***

10 Aug 2019

#peaks

I’d climbed Everest. Seemingly, so had everyone else. It had become a tourist spot with queues to the summit. My last climb needed to be more of a challenge. It was a

Proud

Ending

At

K2’s

Summit.

But on the way down …

***

09 Aug 2019

Love is lasting. #Glory is fleeting.

Greatness

Lasts

Only

Relative-to

Yesterday.

It can still leave you lonely. Love is both the present and the future. It lives with you. Love is looking forward to tomorrow, not looking back on past achievements.

***

08 Aug 2019

At the galactic penal colony we had no way to bury the dead. We dissolved the bodies in solvent and let them #evaporate into space. No hope of reprieve from the death penalty meant

Every

Vaporizee

Accepted

Punishment…

Obviously

Right

At

The

End.

***

07 Aug 2019

You ask why I can’t love again now she is gone. Because our relationship was all-consuming. We transcended the physical and cast mere #emotion aside. She took me where

Every

Mood

Offered

The

Intensity

Of

Nirvana.

There was no way back from there.

***

06 Aug 2019

We set the land ablaze and the #wildfire spread rapidly in the arid conditions,

Woodland

In

Lasting

Destruction,

Forest

In

Retreat

Everywhere.

Climate change had created ideal conditions for a scorched earth policy. The population fled before us.

***

05 Aug 2019

At last peace was established across the entire world. It happened once the empire was united by an #empress. For the first time ever she prevented

Every

Male

Potentate

Ruling

Every

Sovereign

State.

It was no coincidence. Women were better at it.

***

04 Aug 2019

Son, you’ll know if it’s going to be a bad summer when #Jupiter appears clear in the sky in May. Then

June

Under

Precipitation

Is

The

End

Result.

Call me a pessimist but floods, crop failure and blight always follow as sure as night follows day.

***

03 Aug 2019

I’m sorry my Lord Archbishop but you made me join as your spy. I had to #sacrifice my faith to blend into the coven. When

Some

Adopted

Carnal

Rituals,

Immodestly

Fornicating

In

Ceremonial

Exhibitionism,

I felt obliged to join in or blow my cover.

***

02 Aug 2019

They’d heard it all before. Her words were so #familiar. Each new man that she dated was ‘the one’. “It’s

Full-on

And

Meaningful;

It

Literally

Is

A

Relationship.”

They stocked up on wine, ice-cream and tissues ready for the inevitable outcome.

***

01 Aug 2019

When she awoke she found herself in what appeared to be a #cellar. It was

Completely

Enclosed,

Lacking

Light,

Accommodating

Rats.

“Well at least I’ll have a food source,” she thought. “I believe they taste like chicken.”

***

31 Jul 2019

It started in 1588: the English Channel. When faced by the Spanish Armada, #Queen Elizabeth I’s sailors
 
Quite
Unequivocally
Eliminated
Enemy
Navy…
 
… and Britain has won virtually every battle at sea since then … but never the America’s Cup?

***

30 Jul 2019

Moses led the Israelites like a #flock. Presenting them with the 10 Commandments they

Frantically

Latched

Onto

Common

Knowledge

as rules to guide their lives. All sensible and peace-loving people now follow similar rules to keep their flock safe.

***

29 Jul 2019

Fagin collects each #stray to

Steal,

Take,

Rob …

And

Yet

for a while it is a better life for Oliver than in the workhouse … until he finds out the truth and it costs Nancy her life as

Sikes

Takes

Revenge

Against

Young-woman.

***

28 Jul 2019

We are surrounded and outnumbered. We can #renounce our vows and ask for clemency or die in one last fight. Do we surrender and live with dishonour

Reject

Everything

Noble,

Offer

Up-to

Negotiation,

Committing

Evermore

to their side or die fighting?

***

27 Jul 2019

When Governments negotiate with #intent then citizens can expect

INternational

Treaties

Ending

Nuclear

Turmoil.

However businessmen who think diplomacy is only about ‘playing hardball’ and nothing else can’t expect to achieve significant results.

***

26 Jul 2019

Welcome to the Lunar Correctional Facility, the prison of last resort. If you thought that incarceration on Earth was #hell then think again. During your stay you will suffer evil like never before and

Here

Evil

Lasts

Longer

with nowhere to escape to.

***

25 Jul 2019

“Miss Bennet, you cannot be surprised by my question. Your family’s situation is so far below that of my nephew’s that surely

Any

Nuptial

Suggestions

Will

Expect

Rejection?”

Lizzie’s #answer is not what Lady Catherine wants to hear. Blown it!

***

24 Jul 2019

She learnt the hard way not to #joke with the Customs staff. Her

Jesting

Over

Kipling

Esile’s

contents resulted in more than her hand bag being impounded. The handsome guy that had asked her to take the small package through had quickly disappeared.

***

23 Jul 2019

Pining for a broken romance is a #folly. Being

Foolish

Over

Lost

Love’s

Yearning

can lead to

Fanciful

Over-reaction,

Like

Lovers-Leap

Yawning.

Banish such thoughts. In time you will get over it and find someone who loves you back.

***

22 Jul 2019

During WW2 most UK road signs were pointed #elsewhere to confuse enemy invaders.

Every

Local

Signpost,

Each

Way-marker

Having

Erratically

Re-routed

Everything,

it’s always puzzled me as to how genuine travellers then found their way about.

***

21 Jul 2019

As a child his mind was like a parched desert in need of water. He read his way through a #stack of books in the public library

Substantially

To

Acquire

Comprehensive

Knowledge

and to feed his thirst for adventure. His mind became a fertile garden.

***

20 Jul 2019

It takes 3 days to #fly there from

Final

Lift-off

Yesterday

to Moon Landing tomorrow and 3 days back. In that time we work hard. If they give you this message you will know that the day before lift-off when

Finally

Leaving

You

was the hardest of all

***

19 Jul 2019

The #verdant jungle comprised a

Very

Extensive

Rainforest

Defying

Any

Natural

Trail.

Weeks of trekking, hacking a pathway across it, brought them to a ridge overlooking a hidden valley. Had Tarzan led them to the fabled Elephant’s Graveyard at last?

***

18 Jul 2019

Climate change advanced quickly, solutions slowly. A satisfactory outcome was #unlikely. Each item of

Unimaginable

News

Learnt,

Incredible

Knowledge

Expected

Last

Year

came with denial and delay. Then the icecaps melted and it was too late anyway.

***

17 Jul 2019

Lizzie’s concerns for Lydia’s #reputation are played down by Mr Bennet.

Rest

Easy,

Put

Upset

Totally

Aside,

Thoroughly

Ignore

Occasional

Name-calling.

“For what do we live but to make sport for our neighbours, and laugh at them in our turn.”

***

16 Jul 2019

The discovery got the archaeologists so excited that they ignored the obvious warnings. It didn’t do to #delve deeper. The

Detailed

Exhumation

Left

Viruses

Exposed

and that

Deadly

Exposure

Led-to

Virtual

Extermination.

Why do they never listen?

***

15 Jul 2019

He burst through the doors. The congregation turned as one to face him. Words poured from him in a #torrent

Tumbling

Over

Rocks,

Rushing

Effortlessly,

No-longer

Trapped.

The meaning was clear

“Please don’t marry him”

Tears welled in her eyes.

***

14 Jul 2019

Well you asked so I’ll tell you. The 1960s saw the

Birth

Of

Youth

when music, art, fashion and freedom all combined and ‘ #boy meets girl ‘ exploded into technicolour. It was when I met your grandmother. Nothing has ever been as good since then.

***

13 Jul 2019

Prospectors

Recc’ed

Every

Canyon

In

Ostensibly

Useless

Searching.

Then I travelled back in time to buy up all those worthless claims. I was investing in a future galactic market … in something more #precious than gold … rare dilithium crystals.

***

12 Jul 2019

She felt her way along the #tunnel wall in the pitch dark, heading towards a pinprick of light as

The

Underpass

Now

Neared

Exit

Level.

Hope of a way out at last … until the oncoming train sounded it’s horn and the light disappeared.

***

11 Jul 2019

#fury

The cyclone had built to maximum

Ferocity

Until

Respite

Yesterday

Slowly we emerged from the wreckage. Some began dismantling the temporary shelter-covers from over the holes in the ground. They weren’t aware that we were only in the eye of the storm.

***

10 Jul 2019

It looked an easy way to make money but it was just a #trick. I fell for a

Total

Rip-off

Involving

Card

Knowledge.

When I sobered up I was broke, stranded on the quayside and out of luck. She was gone and Find The Lady now had a whole new meaning.

***

09 Jul 2019

Hannibal will only provide cryptic advice in return for personal information. Clarice knows that

Below

Each

New

Expression

A

Truth

Hides.

But should she tell him about the lambs screaming to get #beneath his silence?

***

08 Jul 2019

Father,

News reaches me that your health is poor. We parted on bad terms. I regret that. I left your #reach to become the man that I wanted to be. Now I am

Rushing

Expectantly

And

Coming

Home

to request a reconciliation before it is too late.

Your loving son

***

07 Jul 2019

#sting

Our first experience of sex was a disaster. A glorious day alone, swimming up at the lake and chasing each other naked through the woods. It ended with a

Sudden

Tingling

Involving

Naked

Gamboling

Into

Nettle

Garden;

a rash impulse lodged in my memory forever.

***

06 Jul 2019

All day we chased them down

Until

Night

Fell,

Using

Restricted

Light

to move alongside. We’d flown a false flag to fool them. As we closed the gap, the skull & crossbones began to #unfurl from our masthead. They would see it at first light and realise their fate.

***

05 Jul 2019

In ‘Close Encounters’ the aliens made first #contact using the 5 tones as a basic language and

Communicated

Offering

Notes

To

Activate

Clear

Thought.

Music is a universal medium combining the beauty of form, harmony and emotion. What better way to greet each other?

***

04 Jul 2019

1984: Winston Smith realises that Big Brother cannot make you happy because he restricts your #liberty.

Life

Is

Better

Embracing

Responsibility

Towards

Yourself

even if it puts you in conflict with the state. But he places himself at risk in sharing that awareness.

***

03 Jul 2019

Their marriage was based on #equanimity; companionship for him, security for her. Her mother had arranged it saying “Romance is over-rated,

EQUilibrium

And

Normality

Is

My

Inheritance

To

You.

Love will grow eventually.”

Despite three children, love never arrived.

***

02 Jul 2019

He was her first boyfriend and he adored her clothes, especially her prom dress with the #braid waistband. It had a woven

Border

Running

Around

It’s

Diameter.

He was desperate to get her out of it so that he could try it on and see himself in the mirror.

***

01 Jul 2019

Sensible nations seek their #fortune through peace and trade. Aggressive nations, like North Korea and Iran, think that developing nuclear arsenals is the way forward. But is that a

Fatal

Over-

Reaction

To

Underpin

National

Economy?

Only time will tell.

***

30 Jun 2019

How does a psychiatrist know which is the true #psyche of a potential killer with multiple personality disorder? If the

Personality

Splits

You

Can’t

Help

Everyone.

What if the treatment results in the wrong identity remaining? Can you ever trust the patient?

***

29 Jun 2019

(In response to the #prompt word and the photo )

The law of unforeseen consequences: the android babysitters #protect,

Providing

Robotic

Oversight

To

Every

Child

Today,

but are so effective that parents have more time for pleasure, taking it to extremes and increasing the divorce rate as a result. Then kids suffer.

***

28 Jun 2019

Climate change introduced an #epoch of extremes. Parts of the world suffered

Elongated

Periods

Of

Crippling

Heat

whilst others endured

Extended

Periods

Offering

Cold

Hardship.

Migration to the milder zones became a major issue, leading to war.

***

27 Jun 2019

(In response to the #prompt word and the photo )

Fightback: The #Regime trapped us in City Hall, intending to destroy us by

Releasing

Ethylsarin

Gas

Into

Main

Entrances.

We escaped via the sewers, came up behind them, closed the doors and set it afire turning that

Relatively

Easy

Getaway

Into

Mass

Extermination.

***

26 Jun 2019

All my life I’d chased the #mythos but all my beliefs and assumptions never brought me happiness. There was no golden fleece for me. Then I met her and realised that it had been too

Many

Years

To

Hold

Onto

Superstitions.

She gave me a child and a future.

***

25 Jun 2019

My all-time favourite character: Long John #Silver

A complex villain with criminal leanings but redeeming qualities. He is

So

Incredibly

Likeable,

Virtually

Encouraging

Release,

that Jim Hawkins must assist him to evade Execution Dock at the end of Treasure Island

***

24 Jun 2019

It was a perfectly innocent remark.

“I met him at the horticultural show. He had a marrow of #cosmic proportions,

Completely

Over

Sized

Measured

In

Centimetres.

He won first prize with it.”

She couldn’t understand why her friends found it so funny.

***

23 Jun 2019

(In response to the #prompt word and the photo )

It was amazing how quickly events could turn around. Her #mood had been

Mainly

One

Of

Desperation

after frantically searching. Then the dog re-appeared, shook himself off and sat down beside her. The river became something beautiful again.

***

22 Jun 2019

We met on a dark, deserted corner near the docks. The #scars on his face from

Slashes,

Cuts

And

Razor

Slits

indicated a violent life. Yet his

Seemingly

Calm

And

Reassuringly

Serene

manner contradicted them, until he asked ‘Do you want him to suffer first?’

***

21 Jun 2019

Log: Tricky landing on a deserted, damp planet. We’ve lasered #iron ore deposits to fashion a crude steel patch to close a small hole in the hull, taking ages to get it right. By take-off the only question we’ll have is if the rest of the ship

Is

Rusty

Or

Not?

*

In my youth I worked in the ship yard, attaching metal plates onto the hulls with iron bolts. It was riveting work. (Groan)

***

20 Jun 2019

I’d been travelling too long. When he greeted me I held him in a loving #embrace,

Encircling

My

Brother

Round (his)

Arms,

Crying

Emotionally.

Time warp speed had hardly aged me but I had missed my twin’s life completely. Now he was an old man.

***

19 Jun 2019

#bistro

My little bookshop on the village main street was reasonably popular but

Business

Improved

Since

The

Restaurant

Opened

next door. That’s how we met. A coffee break as the sun was shining. We shared a love of books and the last table outside my front door.

***

18 Jun 2019

The aliens appeared to be #sentient beings. Whilst with them they were careful of our feelings,

Sensitively

Expressing

Nurturing

Traits

Into

Every

Natural

Thought.

Only later, as our numbers thinned out, we realised that they also liked the taste of us.

***

17 Jun 2019

(In response to the #prompt word and a photo of ‘that man in the spiffy top hat’)

As the man in the spiffy top hat walked away from the funeral the #fog descended. He was

Full

Of

Gloom

but

Freed

Of

Grief.

He had done his best for her though she didn’t deserve it. Now he just needed to be

Full

Of

Gin

To

Forget

One’s

Guilt,

at last.

***

16 Jun 2019

We knew that a #totem pole was a carved

Tree-trunk

Offering

Totally

Emblematic

Meanings

Placed

Onto

Local

Environment.

Too late we learnt that its symbols meant “Private Property. Keep out. Danger of death.” The cliff edge came as a total surprise.

***

15 Jun 2019

He encountered much snobbery over wine . He recognized each #vintage including the

Very

Interesting

New

Tastes,

Adding

Grape

Experience

to his skill. Soon he was the top taster and the snobs were paying him well for his advice. Fools and their money are …

***

14 Jun 2019

After my breakdown I bought a #bolt of fabric and went to sewing classes to ‘recover’. From that

Bale

Of

Linen

Tulle

I made lots of curtains and eventually managed to ‘pull myself together’.

(Groan – I know – old jokes in bad taste – sorry).

***

13 Jun 2019

Alone in bed in the dark. If your mind is going to play tricks then the #midnight hour is when it will happen. It is the

Main

Interval

During

Night

Invoking

Ghastly

Haunting

Thoughts.

But are you sure it really is just your imagination?

***

12 Jun 2019

Before D-Day the Allies’ #ruse to use ‘Garbo’ to provide false info about a landing site north of Calais was a

Really

Useful

Subterfuge

Employed

to make the Nazis concentrate defences there. It helped my Dad to survive Gold Beach for me to write this today.

***

11 Jun 2019

Love Story (1970): The credits roll. You feel #empathy for Oliver, left alone when Jenny dies. The

End

Music

Plays

And

The

Heart

Yearns.

Everyone has left. You sit alone in the dark of the cinema sobbing “Love means never having to say you’re sorry.”

***

10 Jun 2019

Silence. Only vultures circled, spreading their #wings on the thermals,

Wheeling

In

Night’s

Grim

Sky,

Waiting-for

It’s

Naked

Glaring

Sunrise

to glide down and feast upon the abandoned corpses from yesterday’s battle. Silence.

***

09 Jun 2019

Freeing it from the stone, Arthur saw the

Markings

On

The

Inside

Face

of the blade. Merlin had said that the #motif would change to suit each new king. Excalibur now boasted a pattern of ‘A’s intertwined with a dragon along its length. He raised it aloft.

***

08 Jun 2019

A brick house. Tunnel, lay siege, bulldozer, dynamite, fire?

So

Many

Options

Kept

Emerging.

Then the #smoke cleared and he could see (the) answer. Smoke him out! And that would cure the bacon at the same time. One thing was certain – no more huffing and puffing.

***

07 Jun 2019

Dementia was relentless. The nearer he got to his #century the more he struggled to

Complete

Every

New

Thought…

Until

Recent

Years

when new drugs provided a miracle cure. But he couldn’t enjoy those years as he had to abandon his retirement to fund them.

***

06 Jun 2019

It was soon over. The #craven villagers were

Completely

Routed

And

Very

Easily

Neutralised.

Young men were the first to be put to the sword.

Children

And

Vulnerable

Elders,

Rounded-up

Next,

were herded into a cavern. The women were taken for …

***

05 Jun 2019

“Can you describe this #phantasm , Watson?”

“Not really, Holmes…

Phantoms

   Have

   A

   Non-

   Too

   Accurate

   Shape

   Methinks.”

“Never trust to general impressions my boy, but concentrate yourself upon details.”

***

04 Jun 2019

The womens rugby team’s training meant Friday nights in the pub and next morning at yoga class.The #lotus position placed

Lots

Of

Thighs

Under

Strain

Particularly

On

Saturdays

If

They’d

Imbibed

Over

Night.

The afternoon game was not a pretty sight either.

***

03 Jun 2019

The sound of leather on #willow on an English village cricket green. As the afternoon shadows lengthen, that tranquil summer scene can mask a cut-throat local rivalry and a bitter, win-at-all costs mentality, often dependent upon

Who

Is

Last-man

Left

On

Wicket.

***

02 Jun 2019

The final ingredients were

Contents

Rarely

Used,

Cooked

Into

Boiling

Liquified

Effluvium

in the #crucible. I didn’t want to sip it but there was no going back now. The only cure for my fatal disease had required human sacrifice.

***

01 Jun 2019

*Selected for publication in the 2019 VSS 365 Anthology.*

vss365-1    vss365-2

Eternal life was both a blessing and a curse. He had to keep moving or people noticed how #ancient he became. It was dangerous to be different. His rule was

Another

New

Century

In

Each

New

Town.

It was time to move on again as his body prepared for renewal.

***

31 May 2019

Was I asleep? Or lost in a daydream? Was it just a #reverie producing a

Really

Expressive

Vision,

Exceedingly

Real

In

Experience?

Or had I truly been abducted by aliens? The missing eight hours and mild radiation burns required an explanation.

***

30 May 2019

2/4/1801: the Battle of Copenhagen. The most famous #patch or #patchie* in history. Nelson puts the telescope to the

 Piece

 Attached

 To

 Cover

 Hole

(In

 Eye-socket)

to ignore his Admiral’s signal to retreat. “I see no ships.” Brilliant.

[*n.b. The prompt-setter’s dog was called ‘Patchie’ – I don’t think that it’s a real word, at least not spelt that way.]

***

29 May 2019

Unnoticed by day, he dreamt of becoming a star at night. The club-owner gave him a trial under his stage-name of #Orion. But as his

Outfit

Refashioned

Into

Open

Nakedness

the packed house of hen parties just laughed at Orion’s nebulous sword.

***

28 May 2019

When he found them in bed together he shot his best friend and stabbed his wife. Then he began to #regret it as he

Rued

Each

Gunshot,

Repented

Every

Thrust.

Now he was completely alone, having killed the only two people that he could really talk to.

***

27 May 2019

After she died he withdrew into #silence. No-one called. He stayed indoors, ordered groceries over the internet, stopped speaking for months at a time. It was less painful

Simply

Imitating

Life,

Experiencing

Nothing,

Completely

Empty.

Waiting.

***

26 May 2019

B

R

Exit

And

T

Heresa

will be forever linked in my memory by that choking last #breath of her resignation speech. She will not be missed but worse may be to follow.

***

25 May 2019

The teacher ignored the ‘Keep Out’ signs. Our surroundings became more #verdant. We found the

Vegetation

Extremely

Robust,

Defying

Any

Nature

Trail

as we hacked our way through it, asking “Why is he leading us into here?” Then we heard the sounds.

***

24 May 2019

Her emotions had been damaged in a #vile relationship, leaving her with

Very

Intensively-

Low

Esteem

for men. He wanted to be the one to bring her back from such

Virtually

Intransigent

Low

Expectations.

It might take time but she was worth it.

***

23 May 2019

1314: Legend has it that, at his lowest point before victory at Bannockburn, Robert the Bruce was inspired by

Gazing

On

Spider

Spinning

A

Mesh;

Endlessly

Repeating

until the #gossamer web was complete. Like the spider he determined not to quit.

***

22 May 2019

When she rang I felt a #frisson of the old excitement. She’d always been able to get to me. But then those old

Feelings

Rising

Inside

Suddenly

Stopped,

Offering

Nothing.

Instead I thought of you. I knew then that finally I was over her.

***

21 May 2019

Your #susurrus comes at night as I sleep. In my ear, murmuring

Softly

Undulating

Sounds,

Urging

Revenge,

Replacing

Undisturbed

Sleep.

I dread to hear you from beyond the grave but I know that you are right. It has to be done.

***

20 May 2019

When I finally came around to writing his life story I discovered a #myriad of detail with

Many

Years

Recorded

In

Accurate

Diaries.

It became more a matter of choosing what to leave out than what to include, in order to preserve his reputation.

***

19 May 2019

He didn’t need to turn to know that she had entered the room. The #sillage of her fragrance hung in the air as she walked, the

Scent

Inspiring

Lingering

Looks

And

Glanced

Exchanges

from the other men as they turned. He smiled.

***

18 May 2019

The mood had been strained. After the meal we went outside, climbed the stairs to the roof and put aside our differences to smell the #petrichor providing a

Pleasant

Experience;

The

Rain

Inspiring

Complete

Harmony

Once

Receded.

***

17 May 2019

“Let me tell you. The largest piece of #flotsam found

FLoating

On

The 

Sea

And

Mystifying

was the Marie Celeste. Only I know what really happened. Buy me another rum and I’ll tell you.” He’d lived off that story for decades. But maybe it was true.

***

16 May 2019

Would they understand the #chimera that we had created? A

Creature

Having

Incredible

Mixture;

Exceptionally

Rare

Animal

with the body of an ape and the brain of a human. Would they destroy it? How to reveal it to the world?

***

15 May 2019

“Tall and tan and young and lovely.” That summer, she was my Girl from Ipanema, the epitome of #lithe. When she passed, I smiled but she didn’t see. I’ll always regret not trying but …

Love

Is

The

Hardest

Expression

Especially when you’re young.

***

14 May 2019

At the end of normal time Ramsey made the England team stay upright whilst the Germans were #supine. They thought England weren’t tired.

Stand

Up

Properly,

It’s

Never

Easy.

Extra time: ” You’ve beaten them once. Now go out and beat them again.”

***

13 May 2019

Finally, we learnt that they could only detect red blood. We survived long enough to develop an #azure dye to inject into our bloodstreams. Then

All

Zombies

Usually

Rejected

Everybody

and began to die out as they failed to adapt to the new colour.

***

12 May 2019

The panic when his Editor needed serious changes. Then the # beatific feeling of …

Blissful

Ecstasy

At

That

Inspirational,

Final

Important

Chapter

… popping into his head … when he knew that it was really going to be published.

***

11 May 2019

The satellite was a forbidding prison. Inmates were housed relative to their crimes. Foot soldiers occupied the sunlit outer levels. Mass murderers were caged in the deep #aphotic levels in

A

Place

Housing

Only

The

Incurably

Cruel.

I was put …

***

10 May 2019

His death was #surreal; seeing giant rats when brought in. The verdict was natural causes whilst

Suffering

Unusual

Reality

Resulting-from

Excessive

Alcohol

Levels

That didn’t explain the massive rat bites he gained after entering the secure unit.

***

09 May 2019

Prediction: Already at the #zenith of their playing abilities, New

Zealand

Enter

Next

International

Trophy

Hunt

as team favourites to win the Rugby Union World Cup in Japan in 2019. But Wales might shock them.

***

08 May 2019

He’s acting strangely. He’s experiencing

Lots

Of

Varying

Emotions

He’s suffering a

Loss

Of

Vital

Equilibrium

He finds it difficult having a

Lack

Of

Verbal

Expression

Don’t worry. It’s all new to him. He’s discovering he’s in #love with you.

***

07 May 2019

Their only child died young. Sadly, life can be #ephemeral. The pain faded over time but never disappeared and in the evenings they would sit in silence,

Each

Parent

Harbouring

Emotional

Memories,

Endlessly

Remembering

Another’s

Life.

***

06 May 2019

Times were hard. #Waifs and strays had to choose between the workhouse or the streets. Was it any surprise that many, like Oliver,

Wandered

Alone

Into

Fagin’s

Shelter?

Mistreatment and exploitation were preferable to starvation.

***

05 May 2019

#reminisce

Most footballers have a limited time at the top. His wife compiled a scrapbook of press cuttings to help him

Remember

Every

Moment

In

Nine

Inspiring

Seasons

Chasing

Excellence.

Even champions can develop dementia from constantly heading a ball.

***

04 May 2019

The forces of nature; despite the obvious danger from the #maelstrom we couldn’t help

Marvelling

At

Every

Last

Second,

Turbulence

Ripping-out

Our

Moorings,

as our ship was swept into the vortex. There was only one chance left.

***

03 May 2019

“Wouldn’t it be luvverly?’ if Eliza could become #demure. Professor Higgins coaches her until the new

Doolittle

Emerges

Modestly

Under

Rough

Exterior

to speak like a Duchess and for Higgins to fall in love with her.

***

02 May 2019

#effervescence

Britain’s North-South beer divide is well known. South served flat, North served frothy. North is best. So Southerners going north should

Expect

Frothy

Foam

Every

Round;

Virtually

Every

Southerner

Coming-up

Enjoys

Novel

Customer

Experience.

***

01 May 2019

I was entranced by the #cadences in her voice, the rises and falls, the lilts and purrs … they were

Chords

Actually

Delivering

Each

New

Conversation

Extremely

Sensually.

Like a fool, I fell for it every time.

***

30 Apr 2019

The villain usually has to #vanish at the end of every pantomime,

Vaporising

Angrily,

Normally

In

Smoky

Haze

(much like Keelagh Rose’s ‘V’ prompts vanish today) to avoid upsetting the children.

***

29 Apr 2019

#valour

1381: The Peasants Revolt against serfdom and a poll tax for both peasants and wealthy alike was crushed by Richard II. In our history, defeat means no

Valour

Is

Credited

To

Our

Rural

Yokels.

And Wat Tyler’s head on display was a lesson to all.

***

28 Apr 2019

In ‘A Passage to India’, with only a #vestige of evidence from the broken field glasses, the British Colonials find it

Very

Easy

Suspecting

The

Indian

Gentleman’s

Expectations

when finding himself alone in a cave with an attractive white woman.

***

27 Apr 2019

Before retiring, when #vacation time was tight, I enjoyed my annual overseas holidays. Now retired with more spare time I can’t be bothered with

Various

Absences

Chosen

Annually

Travelling

Into

Other

Nations.

What changed?

***

26 Apr 2019

As a youth he would #vacillate between a career in writing or crime. He took the easy option and served time. That

Very

Ambivalent

Choice

In

Life

Later

Added

The

Experience …

… necessary to become a successful crime writer.

***

25 Apr 2019

#volcano

As the ash and flames started we rushed to our boat in the harbour and stood-to offshore. Many stayed behind, thinking it would pass. The skies darkened.

Volumes

Of

Lava

Came

As

Night

Overtook,

sweeping all before it. We never saw them again.

***

24 Apr 2019

Zombies find the flesh of vegetarians to be #vapid. Without a meat base they consider those victims to be

Vague

And

Particularly

Insipid

Dishes.

Give them a burger-eater to chew on any day of the week.

***

23 Apr 2019

Dwelling on lost love can produce #vehement feelings. It can be a

Very

Excruciating

Heartache;

Each

Memory

Evoking

New

Thoughts

of what might have been if only I had … or if only I hadn’t …

***

22 Apr 2019

In the ‘ Mysterious Affair at Styles’ Poirot says “Real evidence is usually vague and unsatisfactory. It needs to be examined … sifted.” Poirot is the opposite of #vague. He is

Very

Astute,

Gradually

Unravelling

Evidence.

***

21 Apr 2019

#vice

Question: Is the Vice-Chairman the

Very

Important

Company

Executive

who procures the sex-workers for the Chairman of the company?

***

20 Apr 2019

Exodus 26: Inside the wilderness tabernacle the Ark of the Covenant was hidden from

View

Enshrouded

In

Linen

None could look upon it. Only once a year on the Day of Atonement could the High Priest part the #veil to mediate between God and his people.

***

19 Apr 2019

A #vegan is a strict

Vegetarian

Eating

Grains

And

Nuts.

They are often maligned as boring because they talk endlessly about their diet. That’s unfair. They talk about fruit and vegetables too.

 

🤗

***

18 Apr 2019

#venom

Assassin’s in India put poisonous snakes under the victim’s pre-booked, first-class sleeper train seats. The snakes only came out at night to bite feet, delivering a

Very

Effective,

Naturally-

Occuring

Murder

which was hard to establish as a crime.

***

17 Apr 2019

Heathcliff is able to impose a #veneer over his true character. He

Varnishes

Extensively,

Nearly

Eliminating

Existing

Roughness

just long enough to fool Isabella Linton into marrying him. But the veneer cannot be sustained.

***

16 Apr 2019

The Courts can #void an oral contract because it lacks supporting documentation. So it’s

Validity

Often

Is

Denied.

However a contract with a hitman only ever requires a referral with a photo. It doesn’t need the Courts to enforce any bad faith.

***

15 Apr 2019

In TV crime dramas the #villain Is usually a

Very

Intelligent

Liar

Lacking

Any

Immediate

Noticeability.

Unfortunately Casting often gives that role to a very well-known actor so you can spot the killer immediately.

***

14 Apr 2019

#vixen

Hunt followers and saboteurs need to have formal qualifications. A

 Very

  Informative

eXam

  Ensuring

  Nexus

could be achieved for supporters and opponents by improved knowledge of the law.

***

13 Apr 2019

#vortex

The recent Event Horizon Telescope’s photo of Messier 87 confirms that black holes have

Vast

Outer

Rims

Twisting

EXtreme

Energy

Suction

which draws anything near them into their cores … and there is no way back.

***

12 Apr 2019

The #vikings practice of filing their front teeth and painting them red, possibly to look more fierce in battle, probably made them

Very

Impressive

Killers

Instantly

Needing

Gum

Shields

to protect those weakened teeth.

***

11 Apr 2019

As a young man I thought that I could eat anything. Then I went to Brighton racecourse. For a bet I tried eating cold jellied eels. The #vomit really was a

Very

Offensive

Meal

In

Transit.

Never again. Southerners must have strong stomachs.

***

10 Apr 2019

Art Restorers can now restore famous paintings to their original #vivid condition, some with surprising results. For example the Mona Lisa is now a

Visually

Intense

Vibrant

Image

Displaying

… a man

and the cleaned nameplate reads ‘Monty Lizard’.

***

09 Apr 2019

John McCain (1936-2018) was arguably the USA’s most famous war hero and #veteran

Very

Experienced,

Tested

Extensively,

Returning

After

Nam

…to enter politics, finally taking on Trump. R.I.P.

***

08 Apr 2019

Heathcliff personifies the #violence of emotion. He demonstrates the

Vehement

Intensity

Of

Love,

Excessively

Needing

Catherine

Earnshaw

even after her death, to the extent that he stops eating and dies in her room, calling for her.

***

07 Apr 2019

Despite the evidence of his innocence, Tom Robinson’s conviction was a

Very

Easily

Reached

Decision

In

Court

Trial.

Atticus Finch remained hopeful that he could get the #verdict overturned until Tom was shot and killed.

***

06 Apr 2019

Ben Gunn may be the richest man on the island but he has a #vacant expression and only one request when he first meets Jim Hawkins. Stir-crazy from isolation and eating goats he

Values

Any

Cheese

Above

Nicked

Treasure.

***

05 Apr 2019

16th century headline in Venice newspaper:

Victim In Cruel Incident Obtains Unusual Solution

Shylock’s demand for his pound of flesh is #vicious. Step forward Balthasar/Portia with a humane solution.

***

04 Apr 2019

As a child I picked wild flowers in the woods. The

Violets

Arranged

So

Enthusiastically

in a #vase for my mother are now protected from people like me. It’s right to do so but that age of innocence has been lost forever.

***

03 Apr 2019

The #voice can be a beautiful instrument when used sensitively

Very Often In Choral Ensembles.

However, usually it is just sound emanating from the

Vented Opening In Chin’s Exterior

offering

Verbal Opinions Initiating Communicative Expressions.

***

02 Apr 2019

#verify

It’s serious. You need an alibi. The Police will check. They need

Very

Exact,

Relevant

Information

From

Yourself.

But can you admit that you were in bed with your best friend’s wife?

***

01 Apr 2019

#victim

At the start of every tv crime drama we need a …

Very

Important

Character

To

Immediately

Murder

… so that we have a mystery to solve.

***

31 Mar 2019

Possible definition: A #poet is a writer of

Pretentious

Or

Entertaining

Twaddle

***

30 Mar 2019

The Brexit clock has ticked away every #second up to last night’s leaving deadline. Now the choice is about to narrow to

Seeking

Entire

Cancellation

Or

No

Deal.

***

29 Mar 2019

I’ve always thought it strange. When alone, you wear a #robe before taking a shower. The

Raiment

Offers

Body

Envelopment

covering you from no-one’s prying eyes. But you don’t wear one when about to share a shower and can be seen by your companion.

***

28 Mar 2019

I just love those old U.S. movies where a #collect call is made from a box via the operator and the

Caller

On

Line

Let’s

End-

Charges

Transfer.

It’s nostalgia I know but 0800 REVERSE from a mobile doesn’t have the same romance.

***

27 Mar 2019

Keeping

Each

Yesterday

Hidden,

Offering

Little

Emotionally

she locks in her feelings. I have to respect that. Only occasionally, if I am patient, does she let me peep through the #keyhole into her bruised heart.

***

26 Mar 2019

Shyness used to #inhibit my writing success. Then I made myself try new things, like entering competitions. That works. Now…

I‘ve

No

Hesitation

In

Being

Involved

Totally.

***

25 Mar 2019

In an art competition it always increases your chances of winning if you #frame your entry. But you are still unlikely to win just because you

Fitted

Rim

Around

Major

Eyesore

unless you can convince the judge that it’s really an abstract painting.

***

24 Mar 2019

Speaker Bercow is a #thorn in the Prime Minister’s side. He won’t allow a third meaningful vote on her EU deal even with the latest clarifications. So

Theresa

Hesitates

Over

Recent

Negotiations.

***

23 Mar 2019

Brexiteers fear #sabotage by EU’s extension timetable.

Suddenly

Acceptable

Brexit

Offer

Takes

Away

General

Expectations

of ‘no deal’ certainty.

***

22 Mar 2019

Alan Turing’s team at Bletchley Park cracked the #riddle of the Nazi messages by

Really

Inspired

Deductions,

De-coding

Logical

Enigma-machine.

***

21 Mar 2019

I don’t want to artificially #magnify the importance of that first date but it

Made

A

Great

Night

Into

Fifty

Years

of happy marriage. 

***

20 Mar 2019

You’ve written your first draft. You need feedback but are embarrassed to ask. Submit it using a #pseudonym as it

Preserves

Secrecy,

Especially

Until

Decision

On

Novelist’s

Youthful

Manuscript.

Then you can reveal yourself if you want to.

***

19 Mar 2019

Judges of writing competitions often award a winner and several equally-placed runners-up. This helps to maintain #mutual respect being

Mainly

Used

To

Unite

All

Losers.

Mutual or not, it’s still better to win.

***

18 Mar 2019

You cruciverbalists love compiling crosswords. Some offer both quizword and #cryptic clues. Is the object to provide

Choice?

Really

You

Propose

To

Increase

Confusion.

Either option makes me struggle.

***

17 Mar 2019

The arrival of the mothership in ‘Close Encounters of the Third Kind’ was a truly #awe – inspiring film moment for me. I found it an

Absolutely

Wonderful

Experience.

I wanted to go with them.

***

16 Mar 2019

Do we want a second referendum? That is the #question. Will it be the last

QUery

Expected

Soon

To

Impose

On

Nation?

Or will Brexit never end?

***

15 Mar 2019

Holmes was known to #crave cocaine and morphine. His preferred method was injection. When bored he

Constantly

Required

A

Venous

Experience.

Watson deplored Holmes’ ‘drug mania’.

***

14 Mar 2019

#pocket

1959: As a kid I had pockets full of treasures but a mind empty of metaphors. When Perry Como sang Catch a falling star, you’ll have a pocketful of starlight even

Placing

Objects

Carefully,

Keeping

Everything

Together

For

Use

Later

… didn’t help.

***

13 Mar 2019

Lizzie jokingly tells Jane that she fell for Darcy upon her first #approach to Pemberley along

A

Pleasant

Private

Road

Overlooking

A

Country

House

within

Private

Park,

Riding

On

A

Coach &

Horses

with her aunt and uncle.

***

12 Mar 2019

The #sketch is the fore-runner of flashfiction and microfiction. Versions are commonly performed at the Edinburgh Festival Fringe as …

SKits

Expected

To

Convey

Humour.

Not all succeed but keep writing until they do.

***

11 Mar 2019

The homing pigeon Gustav was #quick. Bringing the first report of the WW2 Normandy landings to Britain won him the Dickin Medal (inspiring the 2005 film “Valiant”.) Then sad news.

Quite

Unusual

International

Carrier

Killed

by accident in his loft.

***

10 Mar 2019

The full stop at the end of every sentence always arrives on the #dot or …

Dead

On

Time.

***

09 Mar 2019

On the day after Women’s Day it is only fitting that we acknowledge the #epitome of the British Suffragette Movement.

Emmeline

Pankhurst

Is

That

Outstanding

Movement’s

Embodiment.

She deserves her recent statue in Manchester

***

08 Mar 2019

#she

Plot Summary:

“She” 1965 Hammer Film:

Ursula Andress is the beautiful queen of a

Secret Hidden Empire

She Has Eternal-life

after a

Seriously Hot Experience

but when when seeking a

Second Heat Exchange

She Hastily Expires

in a

Shrunken Haggardly Ending.

***

07 Mar 2019

Website Recruitment Ad: “Join us and for the rest of your life you’ll be able to look back and say you raised your hand to serve.” If you want to #belong

Be

Enlisted

Locally

Onto

National

Guard.

***

06 Mar 2019

Home Economics Tip: It’s the latest cocktails craze – mixing gin with #syrup. To keep the cost down try creating your own mixers by adding water and lots of sugar before …

Stewing

Your

Raspberries

Until

Palatable

You’ll be too busy to drink.

***

05 Mar 2019

Social comment: Children are our priority. It’s too easy to #overlook their needs. If you have to work they require …

One

Very

Experienced

Relative

Left

Officially

Observing

Kids

… preferably the other parent if still part of the family.

***

04 Mar 2019

Reducing greenhouse gases requires us to #improvise quickly. If not, then we may have to vacate this planet as …

Incessant

Methane

Production,

Reducing

Oxygen

Volume,

Inspires

Space

Exploration

… to find a new Earth.

***

03 Mar 2019

Following yonder star (predicted), “We Three Kings of #Orient are” must have set off about this time of year …

On

Route,

Intentionally

Engaging

Nativity

Timetable

… in order to arrive in Bethlehem for the birth.

02 Mar 2019

#Listen

The Beach Boys album “Pet Sounds” blew my mind. When I hear the track “Don’t Talk, put your head on my shoulder’ l have to ‘Listen, listen, listen’, becoming

Lost

In

Sound

Till

End

Note.

God only knows where it takes me to.

***

01 Mar 2019

20 years after his death by shooting whilst trying to #escape the police, the ghost of the ‘King of Cocaine” was photographed exiting his Monaco mansion seconds before it was blown up for demolition. Pablo

ESCobar

Avoids

Powerful

Explosion.

Strange!

***

28 Feb 2019

Shattered illusions 1955/56. When I was a kid #Champion the Wonder Horse was on TV. He was a..

Clever

Horse

And

My

Personal

Inspiration

Over-

Night.

Imagine my disappointment later when I discovered that they used 3 different horses in filming.

***

27 Feb 2019

Not much of a public #celebration for Princess Eugenie’s wedding. Cries of

Cancel

Everything!

Let

Everyone

Be

Rejoicing

At

The

Instigation

Of

Nuptials!

were drowned out by the £2 million security & £250k clean up bill met by the public purse.

***

26 Feb 2019

I enjoy eating and drinking too much. At every end-of-year party I have an #epiphany and declare my resolution to …

Eradicate

Practices

Involving

Pleasure

Happening

After

New Year.

On 1st January I sober up and abandon it.

25 Feb 2019

Dickens rewritten: the eternal optimist Micawber says ‘Something will turn up” to Copperfield. Dismissing each #yesterday he could have said …

You

Expect

Sunshine

Today,

Eclipsing

Rainy

Days

All

Yearlong.

It makes him my favourite character.

***

24 Feb 2019

#humble

Mr Collins lives near Lady Catherine in his “humble abode”. He says “Lady Catherine has never been averse to the truly humble”. It’s too much for Miss Bennet as

He

Unknowingly

Magnifies

Briefly

Lizzie’s

Exasperation

as they walk to Rosings Park.

***

23 Feb 2019

#lame

‘The Revenant’ plot summary:

After

Losing A Mauling Experience

Limping And Meandering Erratically

his

Leg A Mess Externally,

Leo Attempts Miraculous Escapes

until he

Leads A Mounted Expedition

to

Let Another Man Execute

his nemesis.

22 Feb 2019

Final scenes: In ‘Casablanca’ the #teardrop is held back. In ‘Brief Encounter’ the teardrops are concealed from the camera. Would it have been more effective to blatantly show a

Tearful

Ending

As

Random

Drip

Runs

Off

Proboscis?

Probably not.

***

21 Feb 2019

Relatives who had shunned him all his life now met at the Solicitor’s #behest for the reading of his Will …

Because

Each

Had

Expectations

So

Transparent

of a Bequest

Because

Envy

Quickly

Underpinned

Each

Silent

Thought.

***

20 Feb 2019

#malinger

It’s an old schoolboy trick. Yesterday off poorly? Double maths at school today? Getting over a bit of a head cold? Everyone has

Manufactured

A

Longer

Illness,

Naughtily

Gaining

Extra

Recuperation.

***

19 Feb 2019

Use of the Rosetta stone, found in 1799, helped validate the deciphering of #demotic Egyptian hieroglyphics by comparing

Distinct

Expressions

Most

Often

Taken

In

Conversation

with ancient Greek texts carved on its opposite side.

***

18 Feb 2019

Gordon Gekko’s ruthless accumulation of wealth made him a #paradigm of greed. The film “Wall Street” was

Probably

A

Really

Apt

Depiction

Involving

Grasping

Men.

***

17 Feb 2019

Gatsby’s library appeared to be an #eclectic assemblage of first editions comprising an

Extensively

Compiled

List,

Expertly

Collected,

Totally

In

Context.

None had been read. All the pages were uncut.

***

16 Feb 2019

Many have tried to find the legendary #Abominable Snowman in the Himalayas. Does it really exist? What can it be?

A

Beast

Of

Mystery

In

Nepal;

A

Bear

Likely

Enough,

or a figment of man’s imagination.

***

15 Feb 2019

Matthew Hopkins (1620-1647) was Witchfinder General during the Civil War. As #rapporteur for the Puritans he hunted down an estimated 300 witches by

Researching

Appropriate

Persons,

Producing

Official

Reports,

To

Execute

Unfortunate

Reprobates.

***

14 Feb 2019

Wise advice for your heroine: “Bad things happen at night, my child. As #eventide approaches, return home quickly, drop the shutters, bar the door and light the fire for …

Evening’s

Veil

Encourages

Nightfall,

Till

Impenetrable

Darkness

Ensues.”

***

13 Feb 2019

As we left the pub we were grateful for the #downlight from the street-lamps. They

Defiantly

Opposed

Winter

Nights,

Largely

Improving

Going

Home

Time,

as you never knew what could be lying in wait around an otherwise dark corner of the street.

***

12 Feb 2019

As youths we were often #munted. The rest of us grew out of it and moved on. For him it became a problem as he continued to have

Many

Unexplained

Nights

Taking

Excessive

Drink.

Clearly he needed help.

***

11 Feb 2019

Stage Direction: Frankenstein is losing control of his creation and of his own mind. It’s appropriate for him to #facepalm having …

Found

A

Completely

Exasperating

Problem

And

Laughed

Maniacally …

… as he goes insane.

***

10 Feb 2019

Please sir can I have some more?

More, Twist?

Yes sir I’m #hangry.

You’re hangry, Twist?

Well I’m not very happy sir. You’d be hangry too with

Hardly

Any

Nutritious

Gruel

Reaching

You.

***

9 Feb 2019

He wasn’t exactly some #rando. My boss had introduced us to him. He might put some valuable business our way. We couldn’t refuse his invitation to dinner. Why was it that only my wife

Recognized

A

Neatly

Disguised

Oddness

about our host?

8 Feb 2019

Once it was an unpretentious working class area. Then the middle class started buying up the houses, renovating and improving them, until it became a #bougie neighbourhood,

Bringing

Out

Unreserved

Gentrification

In

Everything.

***

7 Feb 2019

The secret #object of your desires can easily become an obsession. Keep those emotions in check or …

One

Becomes

Jealous;

Excessively,

Completely

Transfixed.

***

6 Feb 2019

Abandoned, alone, without water in an arid #desert. Each evening sees you in a

Desolate

Expanse,

Scorched,

Exhorting

Rain

Tomorrow

but it never comes.

***

5 Feb 2019

Writing your novel requires you to be #deliberate so, choosing your words carefully, you

Describe

Exactly,

Letting

Intentions

Be

Easily

Realised

And

Totally

Explained.

***

4 Feb 2019

In the 16/17/18th centuries a British #convict might well be transported either to America or Australia

Carried

On

Naval

Vessels

Into

Colonial

Territories.

***

3 Feb 2019

Game of Thrones returns with its final episodes in April 2019. How will I cope when it comes to a #close ? After I’ve…

Concentrated

Loyally

On

Six

Episodes

…will I be…

Completely

Lost

Over

Series

Ending?

***

2 Feb 2019

The obsequious Uriah Heep would #bow and scrape to demonstrate his excessive humility…

Bending

Over

Worshipfully

and

Sycophantically

Craving

Respect

And,

Perhaps,

Encouragement.

***

1 Feb 2019

To #read a novel is both pleasure and pain. I have to know what happens next so whenever I put one down the pleasure is to…

Re-start

Eagerly,

Advancing

Determinedly,

until the pain as I…

Reach

Ending

And

Despair.

…then I start another one.

***

31 Jan 2019

Pulling out of the EU with no deal would be pure #bliss to the hard-right Tories’ European Reform Group putting

Brexit

Leavers

In

Sublime

State.

Hopefully they will remain a minority faction.

***

30 Jan 2019

The House of Commons at Prime Minister’s Question Time can often descend into #pantomime, especially when debating Brexit.

Parliament

As

National

Theatre;

Overly

Melodramatic

In

My

Experience.

What must the rest of the EU think of us?

***

29 Jan 2019

Dick W thought the streets of #London were paved with gold. Today’s homeless and hopeless know better when they sleep on them …

Living

On

Nothing,

Deprived

Of

Necessities

… like shelter, warmth and a bed.

Turn again Whittington? I think not.

***

28 Jan 2019

Writing began when prehistoric man first picked up a burnt #stick and drew animals on a cave wall.

Stories

Told

Implementing

Charred

Kindling.

We are still writing.

***

27 Jan 2019

Ideally every child should have two #parents in a

Properly

Assimilated

Relationship

Encompassing

Nurture

Trust

Support…

…and particularly… love.

***

26 Jan 2019

As writers, why are we fascinated by violent death? A knife in an artery, a #pool of blood on the floor, a twitching body

Pulsing

Out

Of

Life.

Is it because it makes us feel more alive?

***

25 Jan 2019

1883 East of Java. A week before the main eruption Captain Watson noted “The clouds appeared to be edged with a #pinkish-coloured light.”

Particularly

Intense

Near

Krakatoa

It was a warning.

***

24 Jan 2019

When we met everything was #sunny and I

Stayed Up Nights Near You.

Then you left me in a shady place to

Sadly Hide Away Despairing You.

***

23 Jan 2019

I was just a boy. Marriage was the last thing on my mind. Then I met the right #girl. We’re still together after 50 years so I …

Guess

It’s

Real

Love.

It can happen.

***

22 Jan 2019

Plot summary:

Burma Railway Is Delayed; Great Explosion

… as the # ‘Bridge on the River Kwai’ is destroyed to end this academy-award winning film.

***

21 Jan 2019

#Hair styles help me date my old photos, being Handy As Instant References despite those styles being Hilarious And Increasingly Ridiculous. But now I look just like every other bald old man and they provide Hardly Any Image Recognition.

***

20 Jan 2019

#horse

In these modern times the subject of ‘Animal Rights’ has gathered serious support from fair-minded people but even so …

Horse On Rider Seems Extreme

…especially over Aintree.

London to York non-stop. Dick Turpin’s mount Black Bess was essential to his get-away:

Highwayman On Run Secures Escape

***

19 Jan 2019

1789: The Mutiny on the Bounty saw the Captain and 18 Crew set adrift in an open launch in the Pacific, 3500 miles from the nearest English #beach. They made it back to inspire a movie.

Bligh Expelled And Coming Home

***

18 Jan 2019

#Lean times ahead as Anglesey’s Wylfa nuclear power plant project is cancelled meaning …

Less Employment Around North-Wales

and

Less Energy Available Nationally.

***

17 Jan 2019

Endless Brexit #spread into 3rd year:

Speaker Publicly Rebuked Ejecting Amendment Delays.

Split Parties Reject EU Agreed Deal.

Sad PM Resists Eviction Attempt Diversion.

Significant Progress Reported 😆, Extending Another Deadline.

(thread)

Second Public Referendum Expects Alternative Decision

Simple Progress Requested Ending All Discussions.

***

16 Jan 2019

Magical creatures roam my local woods. So do irresponsible dog owners. So, was it a fall or a #push? Either way it’s a Pretty Ugly Situation Here. I’m sorry if it upsets you… it upsets me too.

Image may contain: plant and outdoor

***

15 Jan 2019

When I was a kid the #grass in the park was the

Green Recreation Area’s Sporting Surface.

Then I aged and complained about the gangs taking it over and I became the #grass in the park, the

Guy Ratting About Substance Sales.

***

14 Jan 2019

Extract from early script.

Engineer (Scottish accent):

“Warp #drive is essential for powering Enterprise, Captain.

Dilithium

Readily

Improves

Velocity

Enormously.”

***

13 Jan 2019

Life will make you a writer, not privilege. Private schools cost a fortune and don’t necessarily #teach you any better. If you work hard you can obtain a

Tremendous

Education

At

County

High.

***

12 Jan 2019

 
Even on the worst days, when I lie here and cannot speak, I see my wife and children and try to #smileIt’s a way of
 
Showing MIncessantly Loving Everyone
by
Sending Messages In Little Expressions
 
 

***

11 Jan 2019

Unused intro for memoir: It was the decade when it all came together – fashion, music, art. David Bailey set it off by capturing Jean Shrimpton’s #pose with

Photos

Of

Sixties

Elegance

Read 60s teen-angst in ‘Not Fade Away’ at ‘Not Fade Away’ 

***

10 Jan 2019

Christ Hosts Evening Feast

but who was the #chef that cooked the most famous meal in history? Read ‘Who cooked the Last Supper?’ by Rosalind Miles for an interesting feminist answer.

***

9 Jan 2019

Newsflash:

Crisis As Kitchen Explodes

Another attack on MPs as a terrorist #cake bomb detonates in an oven in Westminster. Parliament suspended for 6 months whilst Transport Secretary organises a mobile canteen. Suspect is now doing porridge.

I did think of adding … Police follow trail of crumbs before

C.I.D. Arrest Kipling Employee

but that might have been in poor taste.

***

8 Jan  2019

That TV drama showed our #slide out of Europe after a

Sad Lesson In Dubious Economics.

Can we

Simply Let Ignorance Determine Exit?

We need a 2nd referendum to

Satisfactorily Let Informed Debate Emerge

and then

Seriously Look Into Democratic Excesses.

***

7 Jan 2019

#straw

Alone. Cornfield. Dusk

Scarecrow Twists Round And Watches

Sensing Trouble Right AWay

She Throws Rope And Wraps

Strawman Tied, Ranting And Writhing

She Torches Ricks Almost Wantonly,

Slowly Turning Round And Walking

She’s Taken Revenge… And Willingly

***

6 Jan 2019

Would the handsome Prince have left Sleeping Beauty to #sleep if he had found her …

Snoring

Loudly,

Eliminating

Ear

Plugs?

***

5 Jan 2019

1588. Armada wrecked in storms as it tried to #swing around the top of Ireland to head for home. 6000 perished.

Spanish

Wrecked

In

Northern

Gales

“For 3 days we rode out the storms until finally we were driven onto the rocks.”

See shortlisted poem

***

4 Jan 2019

What were Anne Boleyn’s last thoughts as she waited on her #knees with her neck on the block.

King’s

Nullification

Expected;

Execution

Suspended?

Anne, look this way,” was just a distraction.

***

3 Jan 2019

Incredible but true. The PoW Committee invite suggestions for a break-out from the #cage that is Colditz. “I say, old boy, have you…

Considered

Glider

Escape?”

***

2 Jan 2019

Newsflash: After Elizabeth II’s abdication, some guests at Charles III’s coronation banquet refuse to #drink to his health:

Defiant

Republicans

Insult

New

King

***

1 Jan 2019

In the UK Universal Credit is not working properly. Some people still cannot afford to #eat whilst we

Enjoy

A

Take-away.

Eat is part of fEAsT so perhaps on this 1st of January we should resolve to

Finally

End

All

Starvation

Today.

***

Dec 31 2018

You meet a good-looking stranger’s eye on the tube. There’s an immediate attraction. Could it be a new #beginning? You’ve got to act fast before the next stop.

Brief

Encounter:

Generally

If

Not

Now

It‘s

Nothing

Gained.

***

Dec 30 2018

In ‘The Picture of Dorian Gray’ Wilde’s main character finds a way to #indulge himself whereby …

Increasing

Natural

Desires

Ultimately

Lead-to

Gray’s

Expiry

***

Dec 29 2018

When your work is eventually published it’s proof that you’ve been able to #master the skill of writing. It’s a…

Magnificent

Achievement

Securing

That

End

Result.

***

Dec 28 2018

Hastings asks Poirot. “How could the Police #misplace such evidence – an almost full bottle of poisoned wine?

Maybe

Intentionally

Stolen,

Perhaps

Lost?

Anyway

Certainly

Evaporated…

into thin air. “

***

Dec 27 2018

Nobody answers the door #knocker. The 24 hour locksmith also has failed. In desperation the Prince sends her a text …

Keys

Not

Opening

Castle.

Keep

Extending

Rapunzel

More likely today:

Kys not opng cstl . KP extndg Rpnzl.

***

Dec 26 2018

In a discarded early draft of “A Christmas Carol”, Dickens observed of the #mistletoe custom that ‘Ladies pecked cautiously whilst men indulged themselves,

Many

Insistently

Snogging

Their

Ladies,

Extending

The

Opportunity

Eagerly.’

***

Dec 25 2018

Like Thomas Hardy, he hoped one day to become a #Fellow of the Royal Society of Literature so that he could

Fully

Embrace

Lasting

Legacies

Of

Writing

***

Dec 24 2018

It’s Christmas Eve so #celebrate

Cancel

Every

Lesson,

End

Business

Responsibilities

And

Together

Enjoy

… A MERRY CHRISTMAS!!!

***

Dec 23 2018

To help eradicate #ignorance the BBC World Service broadcasts in over 40 languages and answers the question…

Is

Giving

News

On

Radio

A

Necessarily

Constructive

Endeavour?

***

Dec 22 2018

Camilla says rabbits #bombinate when happy. I had to look it up and I’ll take her word on it. None have communicated with me:

Bunnies

Occasionally

Murmouring

Buzzes

Imply

No

Alternative

Talking

Expertise…

…even if happy.

***

Dec 21 2018

Despite many religious beliefs, it seems likely that there is no #life before conception nor after death. So

Living

Is

First

Experience

and

Living

Is

Final

Experience

***

Dec 20 2018

Especially at Christmas, even the most miserable person must find something to #enjoy because

Every

Now-and-then

Joviality

Overcomes

You

***

Dec 19 2018

Would you reply to this Lonely Hearts advert?

Sailor,

Owns

Lugger,

Intends

Travelling

Abroad,

Requires

Yachtswoman

…to save him from a #solitary journey.

***

Dec 18 2018

If you think about a problem you will eventually see the #light;

Lucid

Instances

Gained

Having

Thought

***

Dec 17 2018

You cannot change the #past. It’s a

Previous

And

Set

Time.

***

Dec 16 2018

It’s hard to be apart at Christmas but opening gifts raises #expectations of a festive time;

Enjoying

Xmas

Presents

Encourages

Cheerful

Thoughts

At

Times

Involving

Otherwise-

Necessary

Separations.

***

Dec 15 2018

2018

In the 1966 World Cup final at Wembley Geoff Hurst took the headlines but Martin Peters made it happen. Described as the #Ghost of ’66 he

Glided

Hauntingly

Over

Sacred

Turf

***

Dec 14 2018

Poster for #inimitable film franchise:

Incredible

New

Installment;

Mission

Impossible”

Takes

Action

Beyond

Levels

Expected.

***

Dec 14 2018

If you are #slow to learn a new subject then

Studious

Listening

Often

Works

***

Dec 12 2018

The further you get from the entrance the more you need to #illuminate the darkness…

Inspection

Lamps

Light

Up

Mines;

Invaluable

Nearing

Any

Tunnel’s

Extremities.

***

Dec 11 2018

Massage brings #comfort to aching muscles using

Carefully-

Organised

Manipulation

Forming

Optimum

Relaxation

Treatments

***

Dec 10 2018

Wedding vows are a serious #promise but how many of us realise that it’s meant to be for life when…

Proudly

Repeating

Our

Meaningful

Intentions

So

Earnestly?

***

Dec 9 2018

In 1962 Mandela’s anti-apartheid activities were #fettered when he was given life imprisonment on Robben Island.

Freedom

Expired

Totally;

The

Expected

Result,

Endless

Detention

***

Dec 8 2018

Opinion: The aurora borealis is fleeting but #moonlight has constancy. So if you want to find your way at night …
 
Magnificent
Orb
Outshines
Northern
Lights
In
Global
Highlight
Test
 

***

Dec 7 2018

The discovery of the Higgs Boson particle at CERN was a #particular triumph for science.

Protons

Accelerated

Rapidly

Towards

Impact

Confirm

Underground

Linear

Accelerator

Result.

***

Dec 6 2018

Frozen snow can be dangerous. Scientists have solved the problem of retaining the #crispness on pathways with a spray containing a…

Chemically-

Reactive

Ingredient

Sustaining

Powdering,

Neatly

Eliminating

Slushy

Surfaces.

***

Dec 5 2018

#nobody

You can have a murder investigation without a body but not without a policeman. When I went to the police station to report a crime there was…

Not

One

Being

On

Duty

Yesterday

***

Dec 4 2018

When he was well enough to travel my father collected and labelled a pebble from each foreign location that he visited as a #memento. They provide…

Many

Excellent

Memories

Especially

Now

Travelling’s

Over.

***

Dec 3 2018

Morning roll call at the Precinct. Kevlar Body Armour may be # impenetrable because it’s an…

IMpact-

Proof

Envelope

Neatly

Enclosing

Target,

Rendering

Any

Ballistics

Less

Effective

… but it’s not foolproof so remember, be careful out there.

***

Dec 2 2018

If you are #longing for a big win on the Lottery then …

Little

Or

Nothing

Gained

Is

Not

Good.

Dreaded words for those #longing to continue drinking …

Last

Orders

Now

Gentlemen,

It’s

Nearly

Going-home-time

***

Dec 1 2018

No-one wants to wake up #dead, but in the morning we forget those dreams:

Death Enters After Darkness,

Disturbing Every Adults’ Dreams.

Dawn Embraces Advancing Daylight,

Dreams Eroding, Amnesia Deems.

***

Nov 30 2018

When a Fresh-Looking Youth meets a Fine-Looking Youngster sparks will #fly. But Foolish Lustful Yearning and a Fortune Looted Yesterday means l’m facing Fifty Lengthy Years walking a Federal Leisure Yard just For Loving You.

***

Nov 29 2018

The Sound of Music – Typical Recall After Performance

The Von Trapp family avoid a Nazi #trap:

Trapp Rejects Adolf’s Preaching,

Trapp Romantically Attracts Postulant,

Trapps Render Austrian Pop-songs,

Third Reich After Papa,

Trapps Reach Alpine Pass.

***

Nov 28 2018

In Dickens’s novel, Mr Pickwick visited many a #tavern. To get to each involved…

Travelling

Along

Various

English

Roads

Nightly

They

Appeared

Very

Enjoyable,

Relaxing

Nightspots.

***

Nov 27 2018

Waterboarding involves a #tap when you #tap for information.

Theory And Practice:

Take A Prisoner,

Transported Abroad Preferably.

Try Asking Politely,

Testing And Probing,

Then Add (hose)Pipe

Tormenting And Persecuting,

Totally Applying Pain

until

Told All Pleadingly

but is it

Truthful And Pertinent

or

Tainted And Pointless?

… That’s A Problem

***

Nov 26 2018

Even the humblest location can be a #sanctuary. Picture the scene. The start of the greatest story ever told …

Stable

At

Night;

Couple

Thankfully

Under

A

Roof;

Yuletide …

… the rest is history.

***

Nov 25 2018

A #rope is really useful for

Reaching

Over

Precipice

Edge

and

Rescuing

Other

People

Easily

***

Nov 24 2018

1620. The #Pilgrim Fathers sail to America from Plymouth, England in the Mayflower to avoid religious persecution. Headline in Devonshire Chronicle:

Plymouth

Is

Long

Gone;

Religion

Inspires

Mayflower

***

Nov 23 2018

Sent to the #pen. Execution. Assumed dead. Body placed in tomb.

Prisoner

Escapes

Necropolis

That was the #penultimate sentence. Recaptured. Sentence reimposed.

Prisoner

Executed

Nevertheless;

Undeniably

Last

Time

Inmate

Makes

Timely

Escape.

***

Nov 22 2018

Advert: Using the #Peerless Detective Agency means that you peer less and we observe for you;

Private

Eye:

Excellent

References,

Legal

Expertise,

Surveillance

Services.

***

Nov 21 2018

#Organic crops now have the Government’s seal of approval as

Officially-

Recognised

Growth

Achieved

Not

Involving

Chemicals.

Can the music played to accompany hymn-singing be described as #organic? Whatever, it helps to …

Overcome

Raucous

Garbling

And

Noise

In

Church

***

Nov 20 2018

Like the Planet #Neptune, today’s acrostic is hard to see so I’ll try sudoku instead…

Not

Easy

Prompt

Today;

Understanding

Numerals

Easier

***

Nov 19 2018

Even now the Beatles (1963) song #Misery still gets to me because it …

Mostly

Initiates

Sadness,

Especially

Remembering

You

***

Nov 18 2018

In fiction a # lion will give you a

Lasting Impression Of Narnia

in

Lewis’s Incredibly Optimistic Narrative

but in real life unless

Locked Inside Official Nature-reserve

it’s better to have

Little Involvement Or None.

***

Nov 17 2018

Thought for the day: To take away someone’s #liberty could be described as being ‘a bit of a liberty’ … but true liberty is not taken or granted by others, true …

Liberty

Is

Being

Entirely

Responsible

To

Yourself

***

Nov 16 2018

A #hole can be dangerous if not filled:

Hazardous

Opening

Left

Empty

If she turns you down it can leave a #hole in your heart as

Hopes

Of

Love

Evaporate

But you can always love again if you

Hang

Onto

Life’s

Essentials

***

Nov 15 2018

The #hatch covers the …

Hole

Accessing

The

Chicken

House

...where the eggs hatch.

If the chickens #hatch an escape plot is it …

Hens

Attempting

To

Create

Havoc?

Continuing the story … After escaping through the #hatch and creating havoc…

Hens

Advance

Towards

Corn

Harvest

… and…

Hens

Acclaimed

Throughout

Chicken

History.

***

Nov 14 2018

The Moon is a #globe:

Gravitationally-

Linked

Orb

Beside

Earth

***

Nov 13 2018

(Series of linked tweets)

In American football it helps to be #fleet of foot.

I’m developing a theme – the American Dream:

Fast Linebacker Evades Every Tackle;

Fast Linebacker Executes Every Touchdown;

Fast Linebacker Easily Earns Trillions;

Fast Linebacker Enjoys Election Triumph;

Fast Linebacker Eventually Evicts Trump.

Continuing the American Dream as President our #fleet-footed

Fast Linebacker Exceeds Expectations Totally:

Fast Linebacker Ensures Economic Turnaround,

Fast Linebacker Eliminates Equality Tribalism,

Fast Linebacker Enforces Energy Treaties,

Fast Linebacker Eradicates Enemy Targets,

Fast Linebacker Ends Education Tragedies,

Fast Linebacker Expands Emergency Treatment

Until…

Fast Linebacker Earns Earth’s Thanks

… And we all live happily ever after.

***

Nov 12 2018

Captain James Cook. (1728 – 1779), sailing in HMS Endeavour showed great #endeavour to discover Australia and New Zealand.

Exploring

New

Discoveries,

Endeavour’

Attempted

Voyages

Over

Untravelled

Routes

***

Nov 11 2018

Luke 4:23 Physician heal thyself. When all else fails set up your own #dispensary.

Doctor

Is

Sick,

Patients

Expecting

Normal

Service;

Arrange

Remedies

Yourself

***

Nov 10 2018

Profound thought for the day.

Life can be either side of the #crystal:

Chasing Rainbows Yesterday; Sadly Tomorrow Arrowed Light

***

Nov 9 2018

When Elizabeth II dies the #crown can only pass to her eldest son.

Charles

Retains

Ownership

With

Nepotism

***

Nov 8 2018

Applying #craft, candidates on the US TV programme reverse the outcome…

Clearly-

Rational

Apprentices

Fire

Trump

or

Recently a #craft was pulled backwards off a sandbank at Portsmouth

Tugs

Full

Astern

Re-float

Cruiser

or

To disguise his intentions Noah’s #craft was …

Cunningly

Registered

As

Floating

Taxi

***

Nov 7 2018

Bikers’ #chapter chooses favourite film.

California’s

Hells

Angels

Picture

Trophy:

“Easy

Rider”

or

Having finished the last #chapter l’m …

Completely

Happy

After

Page-

Turner

Ends

Romantically

***

Nov 6 2018

Dracula spends his daylight hours in the #cavern 

Crypt

Admitting

Vampires

Every

Returning

Night

under his #castle

Completely

Acceptable

Space

To

Lay

Eternally

***

Nov 5 2018

If a direct assault on a #castle appears risky then …

Chances

Are

Siege

Tactics

Look

Enticing

or …Writers, don’t fall back on that old Hollywood screenwriter’s trick:

Came

Across

Secret

Tunnel

Located

Externally

***

Nov 4 2018

A #cascade of applause for Ian Mckellen at the end of King Lear:

Critically-

Acclaimed

Show

Captures

Applause

During

Evening

king-lear-doy

***

Nov 3 2018

#calypso celebrations as the first West Indies astronaut reaches the International Space Station:

Caribbean

Aerospace

Launch

Yesterday;

Party

Still

Orbiting

***

Nov 2 2018

Replace plastic with returnable glass #bottles

Because

Over

Time

That

Leaves

Earth

Safer

***

Nov 1 2018

Is that an #aurora I can see:

An

Unusual

Reaction

Occasioning

Resplendent

Atmosphere

***

Oct 31 2018

Time-travellers should step through this #window

Wormhole

Into

New

Dimensions

Opens

Worlds

***

Oct 30 2018

Others may be trying to #obtain your valuables:

Often

Blame

Thieves

Active

In

Neighbourhood

***

Oct 29 2018

If you really need to #nudge someone

Never

Underuse

Deftly-

Given

Elbow

***

Oct 28 2018

Moby Dick is a #sob story

Summary Of Book:

Sailing Off Boston

Seeking Out Blubber

Skipper Obviously Bonkers

Sperm-whale Obliterates Boat

Sailors Over Board

Survivor One Boatman

***

Oct 27 2018

The world combines to #denounce Russia

Definitely

Employed

Novichock;

Overwhelming

United

Nations

Condemnation

Ensues

***

Oct 26 2018

The Democrats are hoping to be #restored to a majority in the up-coming mid-terms on Nov 6. This is the headline for the Washington Post:

Republican

Exit

Sensation:

Trump

Opposition

Returns

Extra

Democrats.

***

Oct 25 2018

Trafalgar 21 October 1805

Dear Mother,

Went drinking with sailors last week. It’s #obvious that I didn’t intend this but …

On

Board

Victory;

It’s

Outbound

Under

Sail

… oh shit!

If it had been #obviously I would have added

Love

Yvonne

for added impact and gender equality.

***

Oct 24 2018

#wallow in love because:

Without

Any

Love

Life’s

Often

Worthless

***

Oct 24 2018

Always take the opportunity to #wallow in luxury:

When

Assessing

Life

Luxury

Outranks

Worry    (or Work)

***

Oct 23 2018

It’s very stressful being an #engineer:

Each

Nipple

Greased,

Individual

Nozzles

Examined;

Engineer

Relaxes

Sensitivity alert: no alternative meanings should be attributed to the above engineering expressions 🙂

***

Oct 22 2018

When #hiccups start, try this cure:

Hastily

Inhale,

Cautiously

Cough,

Undergo

Prolonged

Silence

***
 
Oct 22 2018
 
Dear Diary, Woke up this morning, saw a magnificent sunrise … had a massive bout of #hiccups … took my breath away.
 
 
***
Oct 21 2018
 
Which President’s actions deserve a #trophy?
 
Truth-
Respecting
Obama
Praising
Honest
Yanks
 
or
 
Trump’s
Rubbish
On-line
Pleasing
Hard-right
Yanks
 
 
***
Oct 20 2018
 
#gutless
 
Godlovers
Underestimate
Total
Logic
Every
Single
Sunday
 
***
 
#narrow
 
Never
Acknowledge
Republicans,
Respect
Our
Womenfolk
 
***
 
If it was rational to be #irrational then that would be … irrational, wouldn’t it?
 
***
 
They called him #eccentric because he had one leg shorter than the other which made him walk round in a circle. But on an oval running track he was the fastest thing on two legs.

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